Selena Gomez is opening her mind. The 30-year-old gets real in the trailer for her new documentary, My Mind & Me, which chronicles the singer’s battle with lupus and mental health issues over the last six years.
“I’m grateful to be alive,” Gomez says in the video’s opening moments, declaring, “Let me make a promise, I am going to stop living like this. How do I learn how to breathe my own breath again?”
Footage of recent conversations, confessions and candid moments are interspersed with tape of a young Selena, as she muses about having spent her whole life working. The “Lose You to Love Me” singer ultimately decides that “clearly I’m still here to use whatever I have to help someone else.”
In the end, she says, “I am happier, and I’m in control of my emotions and thoughts more than I have ever been.” The secret to her own healing, she discovers, is “connection” with others. “It helps me get out of my head,” she shares.
In addition to a behind-the-scenes look at Gomez’s personal life, Monday’s preview also gave fans a taste of a new orignal song.
“My mind and me, we don’t get along sometimes. And it gets hard to breathe, but I wouldn’t change my life,” she sings on the track.
Gomez first revealed her lupus diagnosis in 2015 and ended up taking a break from the spotlight to focus on her health.
“As many of you know, around a year ago I revealed that I have lupus, an illness that can affect people in different ways,” the pop star explained in 2016. “I’ve discovered that anxiety, panic attacks and depression can be side effects of lupus, which can present their own challenges.”
“I want to be proactive and focus on maintaining my health and happiness and have decided that the best way forward is to take some time off,” she continued at the time. “Thank you to all my fans for your support. You know how special you are to me, but I need to face this head on to ensure I am doing everything possible to be my best.”
In the years that followed, Gomez had been open about her struggles. In April 2020, she revealed on Miley Cyrus’ Instagram Live show, Bright Minded, that she “realized” she was bipolar during a visit to McLean Hospital in Boston, Massachusetts.
“I wanted to know everything about it, and it took the fear away,” she said of her diagnosis. Gomez also shared at the time that she’d undergone treatment for anxiety, depression and “other stuff that I’ve been dealing with.”
Selena Gomez: My Mind & Me, directed by Madonna: Truth or Dare‘s Alek Keshishian, premieres Nov. 4 on Apple TV+.